Just Another Reason Why He is the King of Hollywood

Recently my wife purchased the DVD "Something's Gotta Give", and while I wasn't jubilant I did want to see the movie, but for one reason.

Jack

After these years Nicholson has transcended the title "actor" and has become instantly iconic in most roles. Granted this one isn't as complex as he was in say "As Good as it Gets", but you feel you have to watch Jack on screen in every role simply by rote. He's a fixture, he's a man's man, and he still has the chops.

While "Something's" primarily a female targeted romance picture that is only because Jack chose to step aside when the time called for it and allowed the actresses to grab the heft of the script. The reason I even bring all this up is that in passing (technically, "in cleaning") I came to discover that the disc featured a pair of audio commentaries, one involving Nicholson sitting in with director Nancy Myers.

Listening to this master wax theoretic on the craft he's known for is enjoyable, but the best part comes very early, in the scene where he is initially driving into the Hamptons. He's smoking a cigar with Amanda Peete's character in the passenger seat, and Jack reveals a technique when he explains he was unhappy with the way the lightning made his neck look so he had the cigar to block the camera.

MYERS: I remember how many cigars you smoked that day.

NICHOLSON: Not enough.

A Look Into the Life of a Film Critic, or, "Did Anyone Really Ask for This?"

Last night I was having a talk with someone I had just met, and when it came out that I was a film reviewer I got this response: "Wow, you must get to see some really great movies!" Because I am polite I didn't laugh out loud. The truth of the matter is that quite the opposite is true. Rarely do I get to sit in on a well crafted cinematic effort, but this is not a complaint as most of the time I actively seek out the detritus of Hollywood and elsewhere.

While the occasional first-run movie falls into my lap and I get the chance to review it on Film Threat, the wide majority of the movies I critique come from other sources. Independant features and film festival features are some of the most fertile territories that I tread, but this can be a hit or miss proposition. While I desire the indie segment and savor the talent and guts that often is behind a film like this getting made, just as often you can sit through a completely misguided attempt.

Take my recent trip to Sundance where I experienced the broadest spectrum of quality in a concentrated time frame. One film from Italy, "Three Step Dancing", had me wondering why it was selected, as well as why it was even made. The worst of the lot was "Harry and Max", which if you dare to read the review will reveal that it centered upon incestuous homosexual pedophilia.

This movie made me hate.

Another area I've been known to frequent is the often aberrant sector of direct-to-rental releases. These are the films that for any number of reasons never got released into theaters and find their debut to the public taking place on the Blockbuster Video shelf. These can either be festival hopefuls that never found distribution, or lavishly produced pictures that turned out so wrong the studio decided to cut its losses and dump it into home theater, or even those films produced on the cheap with the express purpose of turning a quick dollar in the rental market. In most of these cases the quality is nonexistent; this is not a place to enter into lightly.

My last stream of product comes via the web site itself, a source that I simply will call The Box. Every two months or so I will put the word out to my editor and soon in the mail I will receive a parcel from them containing up to 2 dozen tapes and DVDs. Film Threat, and our publisher Chris Gore, has a high degree of admiration in the indie film community. This was evident when walking Main Street in Park City behind Chris as he was perpetually confronted by those who recognized him.

Even at our festival last year I experienced this effect. I was sitting with a cameraman/producer friend of mine who came in from upstate and we met a woman doing PR for one of the films entered. I explained how I wouldn't have the chance to see the film and asked if a screener copy was available. She scoffed at me, using a patronizing tone to lecture me on the risk of piracy. I shrugged at her and simply told her I had hoped to post a review of it on Film Threat. The woman's eyes snapped wide and in the next 5 minutes she returned to our table three times to explain that she had spoken with the director, then to deliver a press kit, and finally to hand me a copy of the film. My friend marveled at this display and remarked that if I tried I could be a real asshole with this power. (I thanked him for suggesting I wasn't currently an asshole.)

So back to The Box. Because of this clout the offices of the web site get besieged with unsolicited copies of movies from hopeful film makers looking for a break. I once saw a picture of their room where mail bins and five feet tall piles of tapes and discs were stored. This was only what they average on a monthly basis. When I put in for my next delivery they take a snow shovel and scoop up part of the pile and ship it my way. The best way to describe the overall quality of these attempts is that my dog will not go near The Box when it comes in. Daunting is but one word to use when delving into the contents.

The Rance id

It was near the start of this space that I came across another contributor in the blogosphere hiding behind the sobriquet of Rance. He/she purported to be a star of obscure fame and used the blog to expound on issues they normally wouldn't have the freedom to discuss.

It was a fun read for a time, for even while you thought it was a scam it was that small grain of possibility that made it addictive enough to come back, even if you thought you were probably being played. But over time the lack of true heft to the postings began to ironically weigh down the proceedings, and interest began to wane for me. Then there was the moment I felt certain it was an all out ruse: Rance was unclear on the location of Spago! The Masked Star claimed to be mistaken due to his being unaffected by such things as when they closed one of Puck's places, but if Rance is the mover Rance claims to be there should be an agent around to keep this kind of information at the fore. I subsequently moved on.

Then suddenly Rance became a hot topic in the linked realm. Everyone it seemed was speculating who was the true identity behind the Oz like visage, with naming the luminary becoming the new parlor game of the ethernet. Guesses ranged from all around, with names such as Owen Wilson or George Clooney being alluded. Defamer had an interesting bit that inferred it could be the devilish Sr. Affleck, based on a puzzle that might have incorporated a tattoo he is adorned with. But I seem to recall that tatt was seen in a Rolling Stone article and therefore common knowledge, i.e. not so revelatory.

Last week Reuters jumped onto the bandwagon and jumped the shark at the same time when they published an extensive interview with the nebulous star. This mercifully could bring about the end.

And if not maybe the Museum of Hoaxes can. In a compelling and detailed account they seem to have tracked down Rance's trail to that of a political cartoonist and former European minor league baseball player named Keith Thompson. I hope they are correct,if for no other reason than to make the rest of the world look like simps.

He Was in "Gigli" So Why Not The Food Network?

When it comes to unhinged and downright curious screen actors I defy you to name one more obtuse than Christopher Walken. No matter the movie, and no matter the role, you cannot help but watch him when he is on camera. Between that warbling diction and the thousand-peyote-button stare you get mesmorized against your will.Walken has become an icon even though he largely plays himself in every role, but it is the way he plays with his image and what that image brings to his portrayal that makes him work. Think of his character, the duplicitous father Frank Abignale in "Catch Me if You Can, who would have merely been a pathetic grifter in the hands of any other actor.

The New York Times Magazine has a four page article on Walken that is well worth the registration to read. In the opening paragraph alone they offer a scenario that would be impossible to avoid should it come to fruition:
For years, the painter and director Julian Schnabel, a longtime friend of Walken's, has urged the actor to be the host of his own cooking show. This could be more captivating than his turn as a loopy dancer in a music video.
''The danger for me is, it could be popular,'' Walken says. ''I've tried to have some prestige as an actor, then I'd be the guy with the cooking show.'' This is the same guy who appeared in "Kangaroo Jack" not to mention a David Spade movie, "Joe Dirt"--a cooking show would be a step up.

But there are more nuggets to be found in this piece. He mentions a time where he tried out a personal therapist who worked out of her home--
''She had all these pots and pans and dishes piled everywhere. She was dirty, dirty. I thought, How am I going to take advice from someone like that? Not surprisingly it didn't take. "That was the end of my shrinkage. Maybe if she had been clean and nice I'd still be in therapy.'' This makes for a nice read to kick off the week.

Another Divorce Where the Kids Will Suffer

After a long bout of speculation early this year Pixar Animation decided to sever its relationship with Disney and either partner with a new studio or simply strike out on its own. This surprised few people as Pixar's magic has been the sole dose of quality in an otherwise unspectacular field of animation releases from Disney. From a negotiation standpoint this has left Pixar sitting pretty, but Disney may be trying to get a small dose of revenge.

Michael Eisner this past week confirmed that the House of Mouse is planing to release a series of sequels based on their past Pixar successes, sequels being something of a cash cow in recent years. With a new release looming on the horizon
Pixar CEO Steve Jobs was underwhelmed to hear of Disney's move.
"We feel sick about Disney doing sequels because if you look at the quality of their sequels ... it's been pretty embarrassing."
That may not be the only thing to cause the gritting of teeth. The arrangement stipulates that, despite having written the stories and created those characters, Pixar will only receive 8% of the royalties from any such title.

Indie Angst is a Guy Thing

Here is an object lesson from the indie world. Guy Pearce stunned a crowd during a press stop for his latest release "A Slipping Down Life" when he referred to one of the film's executive producers with an unclinical term for the female anatomy (the same word Larry David ended up printing in an obituary when he misspelled "aunt" on "Curb Your Enthusiasm".) The reason behind the less-than-dashing and more-than-vitriolic apellativewas the rather troubled history behind the film's eventual release after being recognized as a quality film festival selection.

"Slipping" was initially a featured selection in the 1999 Sundance Film Festival but after generating some distributer interest the executive producer--there were two, and everyone seems mum on indentifying who is the culprit--took controll of the picture and re-edited it for commercial value. The stars and director balked at backing the movie at that point and it grew mold awaiting a deal. Said producer eventually defaulted on payment and a bank took the reigns, eventually selling the rights, and the original cut, to Lion's Gate Films.

Now with the cast and crew back on board the movie is getting the proper push. It expands this week from 5 to 6 screens. So much for Sundance momentum.

Michael Jackson--VARIETY Headline Writer

We can only hope that someone at Variety lost their job over this
misstep. Of course if
Paul Newman elects to sue all damages will go to charity.

IDP in Beef With MTV Over Fast-Food Movie

This past week I've been talking with distributor IDP Distribution before getting shut-out of acquiring "Supersize Me" at our theater. IDP has been busy with a wrestling match with MTV over running commercials for the movie.

The film is expanding to nearly 150 theaters this week and is doing quite well on a per-screen average, grossing over $3 million so far, which is rather huge for an indie documentary. With the growth of screens IDP was vying for some national exposure on the music channel, but the reasons for the lack of spots running is hard to glean with both sides pointing fingers. IDP contends that MTV was worried the commercials would upset their cash cow of fast-food advertisers. They also say they were told that edits had to be made to the spots if they were going to run on the network.

MTV responded by saying that they "suggested" changes be made, but in the end agreed to run the commercials. Rather than running the ads, says the network, IDP elected to issue press releases. (Natch, this is what's referred to as free publicity.) IDP then states they were never informed of the approval and that MTV only made that announcement once the press release went out.

MTV answered with "No way!!", IDP issued a statement saying, "You totally did!", then MTV released an official comment of "Fine, what-ever". The IDP press office responded with "MTV is completely Durst.", and the network went on the record saying "You are SO not running your ads here!"

One of the reasons MTV purportedly wanted to edit the commercial was a shot of director Morgan Spurlock getting physically sick while eating burgers. Because MTV has such high standards against such content. Or else Steve-O has a contractual stipulation that only he can instigate reverse peristalsis on camera.

Something to Make Israelis Grateful Towards the Palastinians

And, because of a ban, they figured this out without seeing "Body of Evidence".

On the heels of Brittany's laughable "Onyx Hotel" tour her vulgarian idol Madonna is hitting the road with her own traveling circus, "The Who Asked For It?" tour. Or rather, she's calling it the "Re-Invention Tour", which may be her most honest appraisal of her career. She's also experiencing numerous snags, a-la Ms. Spears.

On her second stop in L.A. she had to cancel due to a stomach flu. Then word came that she was cancelling 3 stops in Israel after she received credible death threats from Palestinian terrorists. A source from the Madonna camp said, "She thought she was being targeted because of her Jewish Kabbalah religion."
You know, because when we think of Madonna we think of a deeply religious woman.

This same source tried to explain the Hamas hatred. But this group were threatening her (sic) because she represents many things they hate about the West. Tough to gripe about that reasoning. Her filmography--from "Shanghai Surprise" to her most recent wreckage, "Swept Away" is enough to have her dragged into the International Court in The Hague.

Now Your Cargo Shorts Will Need Another Pocket for the Remote

Right after the United Nations stepped in to bring an end to the hostilities of Battle Bots comes a movie to once again bring divisiveness to the arena of automatons. July 16 will see the release of the film "I, Robot", (Flash intensive) a story in which a mechanized serf is accused of murder, a violation of Isaac Asimov's 3 laws of robots. I never gave these laws much weight. When you have kids who can program a computer to mail them updates every time a photographer gets a picture of Brittany Spears falling out of her dress what is to keep someone from sending a robot out to dispose of that neighbor who runs his leaf blower at 7:00 in the morning on Saturday?)

Fox has come up with a unique marketing ploy to push the Will Smith film. They have people walking about with T-shirts implanted with an 11 inch television monitor and speakers. The idea, hatched by a San Francisco ad firm called Brand Marketers, involves having hired hands--referred to as "brand Ambassadors"--walk around clusters of people in malls and comic book conventions while the movie trailer plays on their shirts. I would guess that there are limitations to prospective hirees. After all if you have an "ambassador" who is, shall we say, particularly enhanced or endowed their physique would throw off the aspect ratio. Unless you want the anamorphic effect.

At Cannes That's a Rappes

I honestly had no intention of including yet another Michael Moore reference in this space but then the Jury of the Cannes Festival went ahead and granted the corpulent chronographer the coveted Palme d'Or, so I have to at least give him passing mention.

The amusing part in all of this is that in accepting the award Moore mentioned that he had no intention of having politics be his motivator and wanted to concentrate on film making. "If I wanted to make a political speech, I'd run for office. I'm a filmmaker, and I wanted to make a movie for people to go see it." Then he expressed his wishes for the film to get a quick release and the put out on DVD before the November election. Because it is not political, you see.

Quentin got his opinion heard on the jury as "Old Boy", the violent Asian film took second place, which in Cannes is the Grand Prize. Go figure.

Danny Ocean on the Other Side of the Pond

George Clooney and Steven Soderbergh teamed a few years for the hyper-slick heist remake of "Ocean's 11" and delivered a great picture. Sure it was a big puffy meringue of a movie, but it dodged being a stupid and bloated affair by sporting a decent script and packing the cast with varied professionals who had fun giving solid performances.

The success of the movie would certainly cause a studio to salivate at the promise of a sequel, but the difficulty of bringing the 12 principals back for a redux is eased by the fact that Clooney and Soderbergh's production company Section 8 are behind this, and the entire crew wants to work together again. This time the effort takes place in Europe with them hitting 3 major cities. A new poster has just come out, looking very close in style to their original, indicating a continuation of the same quality.

One piece of originality in marketing involves the European backdrop. The film is actually working with a team on the Formula-1 circuit, acting as primary sponsor for one of the Jaguar racers. Their debut is this weekend in Monaco.

A Hop,Skip, and a Jump-Cut Gets Vincent Gallo Distribution

Everyone pretty much agreed last year's Cannes Festival stank like a chunk of Brie left out in the sun on the Riviera. Evidence of this was that the biggest story to come out of the fiasco surrounded Vincent Gallo and his disastrous film, "The Brown Bunny",starring himself and Chloe Sevigny.

After, and often during viewings, audiences railed against the atrocity on film, and the usually unhinged Gallo was especially charged up as a result.

He raged that the film wasn't finished yet (begging the question "Why submit it then?"--or better yet, "Why accept it in the festival then?")The best result of the whole affair was a protracted feud that evolved between Gallo and Roger Ebert,(shown here doing his best Tom Wolfe impression on the Croisette.) Many people here in the States expressed regret that they would miss out on this event--people like myself who delight in viewing a cinematic train wreck. Then something happened.

Gallo brought his rotten-tailed film to the Toronto FF and the trimmed down version received--well, a different response. Phrases like "It provoked only mild backlash" and, "It received a far less incendiary reception and reaction" were regarded as raves. But those of us hoping to see it deflated slightly at the idea of a reworked and watchable version. Now word is out that independent distributor Wellspring will bring it into theaters this fall with a home release slated for next year. We can only hope they are brave enough to provide the original cut among the DVD extras. Vincent I'm sure will nix that idea, however.

From Alexandras to Z-Channel

I didn't want to be like every other blog on the planet and give a link to the photo of John Kerry's daughter in the gossamer evening gown. But I will anyway. The thing I have to question--apart from "What the hell does this have to do with John Kerry's campaign?"--is how can anyone position this as a mistake? Most reports detail how the bright lights accidently made Alexandra's assets shine through, but she is a film director--ergo, she should be well versed in the science of lighting and the effects it has on wardrobe. Of course it could also mean she isn't that sharp of a director.

For me however all of this attention is misdirected, so to speak, as the young Ms. Kerry is not the only film maker named Alexandra we should pay attention to in France. Alexandra Cassavetes--known as Xan--is the daughter of indie legend John and she doesn't make short films like the Senatorial progeny. She has entered a feature length documentary, "Z Channel:A Magnificent Obsession", and I might even add that she would be the preferrable choice to be seen in transluscent trappings. The Z Channel was a pay movie channel available in select portions of LosAngeles during the 70's and 80's. It enjoyed a cult following for years as the channel's film loving programmer played what one fan described as a daily film festival.

The documentary is receiving plenty of attention at Cannes and the hope is that it will play the American Festival circut, and I'll lobby our director--who is in Cannes--to bring it in to our festival this year. The only question is that it was financed by IFC Films and they may choose to play it as an original programming selection.

Quentin Crackles on Croisette

They had to know this was going to happen. Cannes has reached its halfway point and one item has dominated headlines thus far: Jury President Quentin Tarantino.

His opening Fest speech was subdued--for Quentin--as he mugged and behaved in his hyperkinetic fashion. But then he ramped up the amp during the Jury Press conference when he and fellow juror Tilda Swinton got into a verbal dust-up over Hollywood movies. She decryed the industrialization of cinema and he asked of her why so many Brits dart off for Beverly Hills the moment they make some serious coin in their career.

Tarantino's "Kill Bill Pt.2" was also released at Cannes to rave audiences, leading many to speculate that the ultra-violent Korean entry "Old Boy" could appeal enough to Quentin to win the Palme d'Or. If that is not enough activirt he has told the press about an upcoming biker picture he is set to make with Michael Madsen and , and he reiterated his wish to direct a James Bond flick. Finally he had the press all a flitter when they revealed he was sharing a suite with fellow auteur Sofia Coppola. (Their kid would surely be somebody who belongs behindthe camera.

No matter your opinion on the guy you have to give him credit for making Cannes something to pay attention to this year

Prediction from the Cinematic Seer Comes True!

It was days ago that The Mother Scratcher made this bold prediction:
Things you can count on the next 12 days--French critics and press doing backflips over Michael Moore's trashing of America

Well yesterday the vaticination bore out when Moore received a lengthy standing ovation following the screening of his anti-Bush polemic "Fahrenheit 9/11". Yes, this Pavlovian response was pretty much a guarantee, but this blog will still lay claim to the credit. After all, we were willing to go ahead and put it in writing.

Over the weekend was another occurrence we could have called--Moore taking to the streets alongside the striking French film workers. Mike gave a speech where he proclaimed,
A job is a human right, a living wage is a human right. This is a human right.
The distinction here is that Moore was not marching with mill workers and pipe-fitters who were hoping for a raise to afford better clothes for their kids. These are entertainment employees, many of them actors, who are upset that their "right" to work 3 months and get paid for the entire year was being limited. They were mad at the government though so Moore felt right at home. For a guy who always looks cranky while in the States he is grinning like a 6 year old while in Europe.

And this makes sense. It was reported that his film "Bowling for Columbine" made $120 million, but less than $22 mill of that was from American theaters.

John May be Forced to Water Down His Movie

The Sultan of Trash, John Waters, has a new experience to contend with. His upcoming picture, "A Dirty Shame" has just been given the "NC-17" tag from the MPAA. The movie is about a Baltimore woman, played by Tracy Ullman, who suffers a concussion and is transformed into a sex addict.

With all the controversey Waters has stirred up in the past--especially fave actor Divine gormandizing on offal--it seems amazing he has never garnered such a harsh rating, but the relatively new "NC-17" tag came about once Waters turned towards releasing more mainstream fare. After all, who would have thought a Waters film would have ever been brought to the stage?

Treatment Engine Pt.2

A semi-irregular assessment of proof that there are new ideas in Hollywood based on some of the scripts recently purchased in Dreantown, USA.

Robbin Hoodz-- With his movie career in stasis--and no new episodes of ABC's The Mole on the horizon--Stephen Baldwin is looking to move behind the camera--or more accurately, he thankfully won't be in front of the camera. Odd that he dreams up a tale of a Mexican-American "skating protege'" who has a scheme to save the skateboard park where he skates. Baldwin to direct. But first he is looking for a co-writer to craft a script.


Door to Door--Brittany Spears is pegged to produce and star in this follow up to "Crossroads", which was about a young girl who takes to the road to become a famous singer. This is about a young girl who takes to the road to become a famous actress, so it is completely different. The girl starts dating a movie star, but rather than getting her a role in his films he gets her a job as a door person at a nightclub. This ends up being her path to stardom. Like the predecessor this too will come via MTV Films.

The Man Who Kept Secrets--Here is one to get excited about. The script is based on a Vanity Fair article about Hollywood lawyer Sidney Korshak. Produced by Robert "the Kid" Evens and Brian Grazer, William Friedkin is set to direct, with venomous penman James Ellroy writing. Try to keep me away.

Brat Farrar--Toss this log into the Affleck chipper. Live Planet picked up this script about the antics of a wealthy family battling over the father's inheritence. Ben's bud Chris Moore is among the producers.

Mexican Rodeo-- Since I can't do better, here's the actual description: A talented Rodeo Clown is thrown off the Circuit after the President of the Rodeo gets tired of his arrogant antics. Alienated from all the luxuries and friends he once knew, his life falls apart. Facing jail time after making some bad decisions, he flees to Mexico, where he meets up with a kindred spirit, an old bull fighter, who helps the ex-rodeo clown to realize his true calling as a Matador. They left off the tag line, "Based on the play by William Shakespeare."


3 Day Test--Though listed as a comedy this sounds horrific. An acoountant loses his mind 3 days before Christmas and torments his family. Now the horror: It is written and to be produced by Corbin Bernsen, and is set to star 13 assorted soap opera stars. Be very afraid.


Runner Up--A contestant from a beauty pagant is sentenced to community service. Her solution is to stage a pagant inside a women's prison. Single Cell Productions bought this script which means Michael Stipe is producer. Yes,that Michael Stipe.

Scattershot Entries

Much to discuss and yet nothing warranted a post unto itself. Thus, a buffet of blogosphere bunkum.

Dunkin Donuts Is Next: The documentary "Super Size Me" gets its national release today, expanding to 113 screens, and you can follow along with director Morgan Spurlock as he plugs his film. As of now I hear there is no screening scheduled in Florida so we here at the theater are looking into bringing it in.

Proof There is a God--And He Punishes: The most uncalled for sequel...EVER! Word escaped that for reasons nobody can fathom a sequel is slated for "Deuce Bigalow: Male Giggalo". As if you needed evidence of this being a disaster a list of insurrections already promised is offered: Rob Schneider will both reprise and co-write the script, the director Mike Bigelow will make his debut after being a commercial lenser, and it will co-star box office poison Eddie Griffin. You know, in other countries this is considered a war crime.

Can't Miss the Single Entendre: There has been an upheaval about the Olsen Twins appearing in a new "Got Milk" ad, specifically what those moustaches could be interpreted as representing, now that they are nearly 18. My outrage is more esoteric. Who does Ashley think she is fooling wearing a shirt with the Velvet Underground's Warhol Album cover? Lou Reed has Honda Scooters that are older than the twins.

Still Too Classy an Event for Him:Tom Green, who has made a career out of killing his career, has seen himself marginalized as much as he can be in movies. He is hosting a show celebrating movie trailers.

Catch it if You Cannes

Today is the start of the world's most prestigious and nebulous film event, The Cannes Film Festival. Basically the streets in France will be lined with thousands of film lovers who have absolutely no chance of seeing a film. Things you can count on the next 12 days:

* French critics and press doing backflips over Michael Moore's trashing of America.

* Quentin Tarantino behaving like an audio-visual geek amped up on Red Bull.

* Members of the foreign press straining all lines of convention to justify a story that requires shooting footage at a topless beach.

There has been a great deal of hand wringing in France that the film employees of that country are going to stage a bit of a protest over their cut in government benefits. It seems for years France has supported the arts by literally supporting their artists. There has long been a program whereby workers in films and other performance arts could actually work a fraction of the year and collect unemployment for the duration.

Now that program is to be overhauled because of rampant abuse and the largesse is being trimmed severely, although severe is up for interpretation. Talk to a twenty-something thespian working three jobs in L.A. while hoping to land a speaking part in a Viagra commercial and see how much sympathy you get from him.