Movies are Too Violent, I'm Going to a Hockey Game

No wonder Netflix is doing such booming business. First I get word that "The Passion of the Christ" has claimed another victim, this time a priest in Brazil dumped his mortal coil during a screening of Mel's film. (Just out of curiosity, how come we never had news stories about babies being born in a theater during a showing of, say, "The Devil's Advocate"?)

Next I see a man got himself pummeled because he had the temerity to ask another patron to shut the hell up during a screening. After politely asking for silence the offender, a 38 year old man, began to act like a juvenile and the two squared off, with the 51 year old offendee getting roughed up and tossed down the steps. The best part? This took place during a showing of "The Triplets of Belleville".

It is not difficult to guess what transpired here. The trog probably wanted to stay home and watch Smackdown or maybe Fear Factor, but his woman badgered him to take her to a movie. She managed to dupe him by saying it was animated, ("It's a cartoon, honey") and then he found himself sitting a dark box watching a mostly dialogue-free art house movie based on a series of obscure French inspirations. It probably took no more than 10 minutes of feelings of inadequecy before he would start acting like a Ritilin-deprived adolescent.

Everything will be OK in his universe, as there is a perfectly mindless and violent release on his horizon. And it stars a wrestler!